Legolas vs. Link
Legend of Zelda, Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter Fanfiction / Written 2/27/02 / Rated G
Legend of Zelda Characters and Concept © Nintendo
Lord of the Rings Characters and Concept © J.R.R. Tolkien
Harry Potter Characters and Concept © J.K. Rowling
I absolutely have no idea why I wrote this... but it's kind of fun in a weird, annoying way xD Anyways, it's Link vs. Legolas around the time Fellowship first came out in theaters.
They're facing off in a Smash Bros.-Style Smackdown with Rose as the announcer!!
GryffinRose: Welcome to fight of the century! Legolas the Elf from Lord of the Rings takes the stage and is closely followed by Link, the Hylian hero! In the crowd today are both Shigeru Miyamoto and J. R. R. Tolkein. I believe they have a little bet going on. *winks* We have Gimli and Saria in each of the corners with towels and water for their team if they need it. Fortunately, we have Professor Dumbledore here all the way from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to referee for us! Welcome Professor Dumbledore! Is everyone ready?
Dumbledore: It appears to be, GryffinRose. Are the combatants ready?
Legolas: With the bow given to me by the Lady of the Wood, there is no way I can fail!
Link: Well, I've seen the Master Sword take down far more than a simple elf.
Gimli: A simple elf! A simple elf? *climbs onto stage and approaches Link threatningly* Why, NO ONE insults Legolas the elf and gets away with it!
Dumbledore: *grabs Gimli's mail and holds him back*
Legolas: Have peace, brother Gimli! I will avenge myself in combat!
Gimli: *Smiles at Legolas and salutes him* I have no doubt about that!
Dumbledore: Well, without further hesitation, combatants! In your corners!
Link: *draws sword and equips sheild*
Legolas: *Kisses his bow and adjusts his quiver*
Dumbledore: And begin!
GryffinRose: And they're off! Link dives at Legolas for the first blow, but Legolas leaps out of the way! Man, those Elves are light-footed! Legolas takes aim and - WOA! Shot to the heart!
But Link quickly blocks with his shield *wipes brow* Personally, I don't want to see either of them lose... What a waste of hot men with Elf-like ears...
McGonagall: GryffinRose! Stay with the game please!
GryffinRose: Sorry Professor! That was it, Link charges up a spin attack, Oh! I can't watch! *covers eyes*
Sound Effects: Clanging of sword and Legolas cries out.
GryffinRose: No! Not Legolas! He promised me dinner after the match!
Dumbledore: Unshield your eyes, GryffinRose, no blood was shed.
GryffinRose: *Unshields her eyes* Phew! A near miss!
Legolas: *Smirks at Link* Some mighty fine sword-skills you have, my worthy opponent!
Link: And you top me on archery any day!
Legolas: *puts his bow down* You really think so? I could show you a few tips if you would like...
Link: Would you? I could always use it to impress Princess Zelda *dreamy look in his eyes*
Saria and GryffinRose: LINK! WHAT ABOUT ME?!?!
Link: *blushes* The ladies, they never leave me alone.
Legolas: Tell me about it. They put someone in my role for the movie and all of the sudden everyone's head over heals for me!
Link: I could loan you some fire arrows or something. They're very helpful.
Legolas: Oh! Those are great! Say, would you like to come see the Mirkwood? The craftsman there are great and I'm sure you would like to see some of our training techniques!
Link: Could I? That would be great!
*Link and Legolas walk off together chatting like old friends*
GryffinRose: LINK! LEGOLAS!! What about ME?!?! *sobs*
Saria: Men and sports. What can you do?
GryffinRose: *sigh* The truth hurts, doesn't it?
Saria: Yup. It sure does.
The End